“If I didn’t have so much of this life all wrong, I would have gotten it right by now.” – Buddy Wakefield
Welcome back to “The Misadventures of Fatty-Boom-Blatty,” or as I like to call it, The Captain Hammer Project.
A few weeks ago, a friend of mine called me. She was walking around at a thrift store and called to ask me what size pants I wore. Cue phonograph needle scratching noise.
What. The. Fuck.
The emergency sprinklers in my brain burst to life trying to kill the panic fires that just started. This is an annoyingly common reaction with me, and I’m assuming with most people with weight issues. Under regular circumstances, we avoid the subjects pretty actively. So when something comes up that asks you to directly address your weight or something related to it and there’s no place to run, it causes distress. Your mileage may vary.